You’ve Aged… Well – Funny Text Message Birthday Card

📱 You’ve Aged… Well

Sometimes a card will sing happy birthday.
This one? It texts it with sass and sends a follow-up GIF of a grandma doing squats.

Welcome to "You’ve Aged… Well" – the ultimate text-message-style birthday card for the ones you love to roast (and love a lot).

It’s funny. It’s flirty. It’s got that passive-aggressive affection energy that says:
“You’re older, but somehow still hot?? Weird but iconic.”

🎉 Who’s Is this Card For?

This card is made for:

• The mate who still looks 29 but won’t shut up about turning 31

• Your sibling who’s been old since birth

• Your partner who needs reminding their hairline is still thriving

• Anyone who deserves a light roast wrapped in genuine affection

If they can handle a bit of cheek with their cake — this one hits hard and hilarious.

💬 Design Features

• Printed like a classic iMessage chat (yes, it’s that real)

• Text reads:
  “You’ve aged...”
  pause for dramatic effect
  “...well.”

• Bold design, vibrant colors, high-gloss finish

• Blank inside for your own witty roast, poem, or panic-typed “love u”

📏 Size Options

• A6 (4.1” x 5.8”) – Like a DM but on paper

• A5 – The classic size that’s ready to be framed or stuck on the fridge

• A4 – For those with a lot of feelings or long inside jokes

💌 Why This Card Slaps:

✔ Text-message theme = modern and instantly relatable
✔ The perfect combo of sass + sweetness
✔ Ideal for milestone birthdays, aging gracefully (or not), and friends who claim they’re “forever 21”
✔ Designed to make them laugh and feel loved

Basically, it’s your personality… but in cardstock form.

🥳 Write Inside Like:

• “Congrats on unlocking a new wrinkle.”

• “Still hot. Still humble. Still my favorite.”

• “Aged like wine. Slightly fermented, but expensive.”

• “Happy birthday, you beautiful fossil.”

🚚 Shipping Info

• Orders processed in 1–3 business days

• UK delivery: 2–5 business days

• International: 7–14 business days (Customs do be customs tho)

🔁 Returns & Refunds

• Damaged or wrong card? Let us know within 7 days — we’ll fix it fast

• Lost mail? We replace after 14 days (UK) or 30 days (international)

• Want to return? 14 days on non-personalized items, just return it in original condition

🎨 Discover the KEOLIX Collection

We make bold, cheeky, heartfelt cards for every occasion — and every chaotic personality type. Whether you’re celebrating love, friendship, or a slow descent into middle age, KEOLIX has the pun for you.

✔ Handmade-style designs with pro-quality finish
✔ Humour with heart (and a little chaos)
✔ Cards people actually keep

💡 Final Word, Keeks

"You’ve Aged… Well" isn’t just a card. It’s a mic drop. A screenshot-worthy roast. A little paper reminder that growing older doesn’t mean getting boring.

It’s perfect. It’s petty. It’s personal.

So go on — add to cart and send the sass.

💜 About KEOLIX

KEOLIX is not for the passive, the plain, or the “meh.”
We’re the brand your neutral tote bag warned you about.

Everything here is handmade, in-house, and intentionally bold. From rude birthday cards to weirdly loveable stickers and statement prints, KEOLIX designs are built to spark joy, start drama, or add just enough chaos to your day.

Want to make your order giftable? Pair it with one of our handmade cards — we’ve got sweet, sassy, and straight-up savage.

Not sure what to get? Check out our bestsellers — the people know what’s good.

Need layout inspiration or want to see what people are doing with their KEOLIX hauls? We’re always building aesthetic combos and real-life styling ideas here. Go get lost in it.

KEOLIX isn’t just a shop. It’s a vibe. And you’re in it now.

✨ At KEOLIX, we believe small things can spark big smiles. Every product we create is made with heart, humor, and a touch of rebellion. Whether you're collecting pins, gifting cards, or brightening your space with prints, you're supporting a brand that values creativity, quality, and meaning. Our designs are more than accessories — they're conversation starters, confidence boosters, and love notes in disguise. Thanks for shopping small and choosing bold. Want more? Browse our latest drops, join our loyalty club, or follow along on social for sneak peeks and giveaways. Stay bold, stay kind, and keep collecting what makes you feel like you.