Professional Insider Trader T-Shirt – Funny Finance Tee

💼 TRADE SECRETS, BUT MAKE IT FASHION

You don’t just ride the stock market — you influence it (or at least pretend you do over cocktails). Say hello to your new favorite uniform: the “Professional Insider Trader” T-shirt.

Bold? Yep. Slightly illegal-sounding? Absolutely. Funny as hell? You know it.

This tee is made for the spreadsheet-slingers, market movers, and financial geniuses who love to keep things classy and a little cheeky. It’s the perfect balance of Wall Street wit and comfy drip.

📊 What’s the Energy?

It’s giving:

• “Bull or bear, I’m still profiting”

• “I know what a hedge fund is and I can explain it… if I wanted to”

• “Yes, I read The Economist — shirtless, obviously”

Sleek graphic. Dry humor. The kind of shirt you wear when you're rich in sarcasm and investments (or vibes, if not actual dividends yet).

👔 Who’s Is This T-shirt for?

• Finance bros with a little self-awareness

• Investors who also invest in being iconic

• The friend who checks their stocks more than their texts

• Accountants who laugh at embezzlement memes

• That one coworker who quotes Wolf of Wall Street too much

👕 T-shirt Details

Material: 100% Gildan Heavy Cotton — breathable, durable, and soft enough for power naps between Zoom calls.

Sizes: S–XXL (because insider knowledge comes in all fits)

Fabric Weight:
• White – 175gsm
• Colours – 185gsm

Fit: Unisex, classic — pair with confidence, a latte, and passive income.

💡 Why You’ll Actually Wear This T-shirt

✔ Looks sharp, feels soft
✔ Perfect for casual Fridays or stock market chaos days
✔ A+ icebreaker at boring networking events
✔ Great way to say “I’m not like other finance bros, I’m funny”
✔ Easy to wash after sweating through earnings season

🎁 Gifting Cheat Code

You don’t need to know what NASDAQ means to know this shirt is the perfect gift for:

• Your trading-obsessed mate

• That intern who thinks crypto is a personality

• Your sibling who just became the market

• The boss who’s 90% spreadsheets, 10% sass

🧼 T-shirt Care Instructions

Wash cold, hang dry if you want longevity, or tumble low if you’re lazy (no judgment). This tee holds up — just like the market after a suspicious dip.

🚚 Shipping & Returns

Processing: 1–3 business days
UK Delivery: 2–5 biz days
International: 7–14 biz days (customs might flex on timing)

Damaged/Wrong Item?
Hit us up within 7 days. We’ve got you.

Lost Packages?
UK: After 14 days
International: After 30
Replacements or refunds are ready and waiting.

Returns:
Non-personalized items = returnable within 14 days. Must be in original condition. Buyer covers return unless it’s our fault. Which it usually isn’t. But if it is? We fix it.

💸 Dress Like You Own the Market

The “Professional Insider Trader” tee doesn’t just say you get the joke — it says you are the joke. The rich, unbothered, ethically-questionable joke who always gets the last laugh (and probably a bonus).

So throw this on. Crack a finance meme. Walk into the room like you just got off a call with your Cayman Islands accountant. Because you’re not just surviving the economy — you are the economy.

💜 About KEOLIX

KEOLIX is not for the passive, the plain, or the “meh.”
We’re the brand your neutral tote bag warned you about.

Everything here is handmade, in-house, and intentionally bold. From rude birthday cards to weirdly loveable stickers and statement prints, KEOLIX designs are built to spark joy, start drama, or add just enough chaos to your day.

Want to make your order giftable? Pair it with one of our handmade cards — we’ve got sweet, sassy, and straight-up savage.

Not sure what to get? Check out our bestsellers — the people know what’s good.

Need layout inspiration or want to see what people are doing with their KEOLIX hauls? We’re always building aesthetic combos and real-life styling ideas here. Go get lost in it.

KEOLIX isn’t just a shop. It’s a vibe. And you’re in it now.

✨ At KEOLIX, we believe small things can spark big smiles. Every product we create is made with heart, humor, and a touch of rebellion. Whether you're collecting pins, gifting cards, or brightening your space with prints, you're supporting a brand that values creativity, quality, and meaning. Our designs are more than accessories — they're conversation starters, confidence boosters, and love notes in disguise. Thanks for shopping small and choosing bold. Want more? Browse our latest drops, join our loyalty club, or follow along on social for sneak peeks and giveaways. Stay bold, stay kind, and keep collecting what makes you feel like you.