Behold — the “Thou Shalt Be All 'Bout Chasin' Dat Paper” tote bag.
A divine fusion of Gothic grandeur and get-that-bread energy.
If you’re building an empire with the tenacity of a 14th-century knight and the side-eye of a Gen Z CEO, this bag is your creed. Whether you’re storming the castle (aka the office), stacking gold (aka invoices), or just doing the weekly Aldi run — carry your hustle with holy flair.
Gothic x Grit Design: Medieval calligraphy meets a cheeky money cartoon — it’s Shakespeare with a Shopify account
Eco-Friendly Swag: Made from 100% recycled cotton – because sustainability is hot and wealth is smarter when it’s ethical
Size of a Hustler’s Heart: 40 x 38 cm (15.7 x 15 inches) – fits scrolls, snacks, MacBooks, and dreams
Durable AF: 130–135gsm recycled fabric that’s soft, strong, and washable after ye Olde iced latte spill
Flexible Function: Errands, markets, manifesting wealth at brunch — this bag does it all
This tote is for:
The boss girl who writes goals in calligraphy and hits them like arrows
The side-hustler who reads Sun Tzu before sleep
The freelancer who closes a deal, flips her hair, and says “It is done”
Use it when:
You’re headed to class, but your soul’s already in the Forbes list
You want people to know you have taste, wit, and multiple income streams
It’s not just a tote.
It’s a sacred scroll of ambition.
Gift this tote to:
Your money-minded mate
The chaotic bestie who always talks in Old English for fun
Yourself — because thou art the investment
Perfect tote for:
Graduation gifts with a twist
Funny but powerful birthday presents
Building a brand persona that screams “I slay dragons and direct deposits”
Pairs with:
Black boots, oversized blazers, or chainmail (your choice)
Witty tattoos and notebooks full of passive income ideas
The vibe of "Yes, I’m working on my empire."
Use it for:
Your daily crusades (errands)
Networking events (or renaissance fairs)
Mood-boarding your billionaire era
Made from 100% recycled cotton
Printed in limited eco-conscious batches
No plastic. No nonsense.
Designed to outlast fleeting trends and TikTok drops
This is not merch.
This is modern scripture for the ambitious.
👉 Add to Cart now
👉 Carry your ambition in a bag worthy of the throne
👉 Because chivalry is dead, but the grind lives on
All orders ship in 1–3 business days.
UK Delivery: 2–5 working days
International: 7–14 days (delays may occur at customs)
📦 You’ll receive a tracking link (if applicable) via email.
Changed your mind? Return within 14 days (non-personalized items)
Wrong or damaged item? Email us a photo within 7 days
Lost shipment? UK: contact after 14 days. International: 30 days
Refunds issued to original payment method after return
📧 For any support, contact us at hello@keolix.com
We make bags for the modern rebel.
Sass meets sentiment.
Profit meets poetry.
This bag?
It's for the ones who rewrite history — with flair, funds, and a little bit of fun.
💜 About KEOLIX
KEOLIX is not for the passive, the plain, or the “meh.”
We’re the brand your neutral tote bag warned you about.
Everything here is handmade, in-house, and intentionally bold. From rude birthday cards to weirdly loveable stickers and statement prints, KEOLIX designs are built to spark joy, start drama, or add just enough chaos to your day.
Want to make your order giftable? Pair it with one of our handmade cards — we’ve got sweet, sassy, and straight-up savage.
Not sure what to get? Check out our bestsellers — the people know what’s good.
Need layout inspiration or want to see what people are doing with their KEOLIX hauls? We’re always building aesthetic combos and real-life styling ideas here. Go get lost in it.
KEOLIX isn’t just a shop. It’s a vibe. And you’re in it now.
✨ At KEOLIX, we believe small things can spark big smiles. Every product we create is made with heart, humor, and a touch of rebellion. Whether you're collecting pins, gifting cards, or brightening your space with prints, you're supporting a brand that values creativity, quality, and meaning. Our designs are more than accessories — they're conversation starters, confidence boosters, and love notes in disguise. Thanks for shopping small and choosing bold. Want more? Browse our latest drops, join our loyalty club, or follow along on social for sneak peeks and giveaways. Stay bold, stay kind, and keep collecting what makes you feel like you.
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We are a small business individually packing & dispatching parcels Monday - Friday most weeks although some weeks we may experience slower than usual dispatch times. You will be notified as soon as your parcel has been dispatched.
We use Royal Mail Tracked 48 services for all our parcel deliveries (Parcelforce 48 for larger parcels) and rely on their services which may also experience disruption on occasion. Please bear with us as we all do our best to meet your needs and get your orders to you in good time.
THANK YOU
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