Let’s face it — getting older is just unlocking premium mode for weird noises, backaches, and being excited about kettle sales. Our “Getting Old” Greeting Card is here to lovingly roast, cheer, and celebrate the fine art of ageing disgracefully.
This isn’t just a card. It’s a rite of passage with a punchline.
Mum? She’s earned it.
Dad? Definitely.
Partner with a rapidly growing mug collection? Yup.
That one friend who says, “I'm just tired” 300x a day? Oh, for sure.
Literally anyone over 25 who’s said “oof” when sitting down.
This card is perfect for:
Birthdays
Mother’s Day
Father’s Day
Anniversaries
Midlife crises (with cake)
Just Because They’re Still Alive (yay!)
The front of the card reviews the latest “features” of ageing — like surprise naps, popping joints, and a passionate relationship with early bird dinner specials. The inside? Blank, because your roast game is legendary, and this is your moment.
You can go:
Sweet: “I love you even if your back hates you.”
Sassy: “Congrats on unlocking the ‘loud sneeze’ era.”
Savage: “At your age, candles are a fire hazard.”
Choose your flavour of sass delivery:
A6 (4.1” x 5.8”) – Cute and compact
A5 – Classic and frame-ready
A4 – More space for your monologue
Each card is printed on premium matte cardstock for a luxe, smooth feel. You’ll get vibrant colours, sharp printing, and a finish that looks high-end (even if your joke is lowbrow).
Includes a crisp white envelope because we're classy like that.
Want to write something wildly heartfelt and emotional? Go for it. Want to include a graphic description of what turning 40 feels like? Please do. This card is your blank canvas — whether you’re feeling poetic, petty, or punny.
It’s funny. It’s relatable. And unlike most age-related jokes, this one doesn’t get old. The person receiving it will:
Laugh (maybe snort)
Immediately read it out loud to someone else
Keep it on display because… it’s a whole mood
Orders dispatch within 1–3 business days
UK delivery: 2–5 business days
International delivery: 7–14 business days
We accept returns on non-personalized items within 14 days
Damaged or missing item? We fix it fast — just email us
Refunds go back to your original payment method (because duh)
Questions? Compliments? Rants about your knees? Email us at hello@keolix.com and we’ll sort you out with good vibes and better service.
Want more? Explore the Keolix collection — packed with designs that make you laugh, cry, and post it on your fridge forever. We’ve got cards for every mood, wall art for your inner weirdo, and gifts that say “I know you better than your therapist.”
✔ Cards for all occasions – birthdays, anniversaries, holidays, or just-because shade
✔ Unique, emotional, and hilarious designs
✔ High-quality, highly giftable, highly displayable vibes
Add this card to your basket and remind someone that age is just a number — followed by a noise when you stand up.
💜 About KEOLIX
KEOLIX is not for the passive, the plain, or the “meh.”
We’re the brand your neutral tote bag warned you about.
Everything here is handmade, in-house, and intentionally bold. From rude birthday cards to weirdly loveable stickers and statement prints, KEOLIX designs are built to spark joy, start drama, or add just enough chaos to your day.
Want to make your order giftable? Pair it with one of our handmade cards — we’ve got sweet, sassy, and straight-up savage.
Not sure what to get? Check out our bestsellers — the people know what’s good.
Need layout inspiration or want to see what people are doing with their KEOLIX hauls? We’re always building aesthetic combos and real-life styling ideas here. Go get lost in it.
KEOLIX isn’t just a shop. It’s a vibe. And you’re in it now.
✨ At KEOLIX, we believe small things can spark big smiles. Every product we create is made with heart, humor, and a touch of rebellion. Whether you're collecting pins, gifting cards, or brightening your space with prints, you're supporting a brand that values creativity, quality, and meaning. Our designs are more than accessories — they're conversation starters, confidence boosters, and love notes in disguise. Thanks for shopping small and choosing bold. Want more? Browse our latest drops, join our loyalty club, or follow along on social for sneak peeks and giveaways. Stay bold, stay kind, and keep collecting what makes you feel like you.
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We are a small business individually packing & dispatching parcels Monday - Friday most weeks although some weeks we may experience slower than usual dispatch times. You will be notified as soon as your parcel has been dispatched.
We use Royal Mail Tracked 48 services for all our parcel deliveries (Parcelforce 48 for larger parcels) and rely on their services which may also experience disruption on occasion. Please bear with us as we all do our best to meet your needs and get your orders to you in good time.
THANK YOU
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